Still October

Its the 18th day of October. Time passes so fast. Before I know it, school has started. The second day of school has passed and so far so good. It started off well and ho-hum-ly. Has reached school in time for these two days. Im determined to change my tardiness! Hopefully its not for the first few days only! Crossing fingers! Class wise, aint have any class with 24 at all this sem. So am kinda sad cause couldnt be in the same class as my friends anymore. But oh wells, no one to blame but me. But thankfully share my core classes with Mich & Zo. Still have company! Plus im having classes with Kj, Arron & Ian too. Awesome!


Hmm. Decisions decisions decisions. Am not myself lately. Aint sure what im doing either. Im greedy and selfish. I know myself best. I just wanna protect myself. Simple as that. Wait, no. I just wanna be happy. Why cant happiness be easy? Why is smiling seemed to be the hardest thing to do so right now? Keep smiling Cecilia.

October

October.

So it's kinda late to post about the start of October but I DONT CARE.

September has been hell lot of happenings.

Some good, some bad.

Hopefully October would be good to me.

I have always liked October. So let it be good please!

School's starting in Oct too.

I really hope October would be kind to me.

Have been feeling slightly moody since the start of Oct.

May it just be the starting phase and would pass over soon! *Prays*

May October be an awesome month.

Family

Family.

The dictionary tells me that it's "a group of individuals related by blood, marriage, or adoption". But what does it mean to you?

Today, my sister and I went home together. And as usual, we talked. She told me I was fortunate to have my mom. I wanted to tell her, she's yours too. But I didn't. She told me, people often ask her, "You seem to dote on your sister quite much." And every a time, she will always answer "That's cause I only have one sister." That touched me.

My family ain't what you called a perfect family, nor is it a broken or dysfunctional one. It's just sorta complicated. My sister's a half-sister. Her parents, which is my dad and her mom, divorced. Then my dad married my mom and came me and my brother. My sister's mom then migrated to France and had 3 boys. My parents ain't what you called a loving old couple. They no longer share the same bed together and of course, don't have sex anymore. I'm guessing they're still together cause of us kids.

I won't exactly say I'm close with my family. But I'm not exactly very distant with them either. I do talk and share things with my mom and my sister. Mostly about friendships and relationships stuff. Afterall they're older and surely know these things better right? I guess I'm proud to say the girls in my fam are quite close, to a certain extend that is. I do love my brother too of course. But he's a stubborn pain in the ass most of the time. I think my brother tend to confide in me more than he does to the rest of the fam. Prolly cause our age's closest. So I could relate to him better. I'm really happy about it of course. Simply enjoy teasing and hugging him all the time. But he's too bony. Ain't nice to hug at all. Tsk.

So exactly what does family mean to me? I guess I could say that they mean the world to me. Cliche, but true. And even though my fam ain't exactly the most perfect family in the world. They still mean the world to me. Even though I'm not a home-person or a family-person, family's still first. I just hope my fam knows that. Laughs. One day, I hope we'll be the closest family ever. Whereby secrets could be shared. Whereby problems could be shared. And love could be felt. One day .. ((: